I’ve been thinking a lot about this question of where I am in life in terms of what I want to experience, and an article in the January Toastmaster magazine, “How Far Has Your Bottle Gone?” caught my attention with an on-point story.
In the article, author Ernest R. Stair writes about a man who puts a note in a bottle, seals it up and tosses it in the ocean. He imagines all the exotic places his bottle would go and all the adventures it would have. He was excited to see where the bottle would eventually be found. Forty-five years later, his bottle was found, only several hundred yards from the spot where it was set afloat!
Stair went on to describe how often the dreams we have early on in life can end up like this man’s experience with the bottle – what we thought we would achieve or experience doesn’t necessarily happen, or happen the way we hoped it would. He goes on to make some very good points about how what we often measure achievement by – money, status and possessions, etc. – fails to really measure what is ultimately satisfying to us in our lives.
I can see this in my own life – yes there has been achievement, but when I take stock of my life, there are definitely places my bottle has not reached at this juncture that are disappointments. Some are pint-sized disappointments, others more gallon-sized.
Since I’m no longer 20, or 30, or 40, there is more of a sense of time slipping by, and with it a greater urgency to ask myself, “How do I want the rest of my life to be? What do I want to make sure I experience before I die?”
The answers to these questions for me have a lot to do with the kind of relationships I want to have with others, how I want to be of service in my career, and ways I want to continue to challenge myself. Yet these are generalizations, and to help turn my vision into reality, I need to set clear intentions, make concrete plans and get into action. I need to put a rudder and a sail on that bottle and chart my course!
With our busy lives, it is so easy for the momentum of daily life to carry us along and then we wake up years later wondering, “How did I get here? Where did I go adrift?” We can also be quite fine with where we are, but still have aspirations of what we want for the rest of our life.
How do we make certain we don’t miss out on what’s really important to us? A few suggestions:
- Make sure your are living out your own goals, and not someone else’s.
- Think about what you MOST want to be remembered for. If this were your last year, what would you do to make sure you were remembered in this way?
- Set aside an entire day or two that you can devote to reflecting on your life and planning for the next phase.
- Write down your short and long terms goals on index cards (colored ones are fun) and review these often.
January is a great time for creating goals and setting intentions. We are given a fresh start, a new calendar and hope for the year year to come.
And no one said that you can’t toss that bottle back in and give it another chance.
I’m reminded of one of my favorite quotes from Mark Twain, “Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do, than by the things you did do. So throw away the bowlines. Sail away. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. “
May 2012 be a year of great sailing for you!
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Thank you Heather for such inspiring words. This year will be my 36th as a practicing physician and hopefully my most satisfying. I want to focus on my “natural gifts” which will hopefully take me into a new area in medicine (physician/mentor for my medical group’s problem physicians) that will be both satisfying and potentially career saving for those physicians involved.
LE
Thank you very much for your nice comment Dr. Escandon. A big congratulations to you for your impressive 36 years of practice! Your interest in mentoring other physicians is a wonderful intention, and something that is very needed. Physicians often are in the best position to reach their colleagues in need, and I think you would be an asset in this role. I wish you all the best. Please feel free to keep us updated!